Stuck

posted on: Monday, May 2, 2016

2016-05-03_1713

S T U C K

That word. That feeling. It’s my least favorite feeling and yet it seems to keep showing it’s ugly head. That place of feeling stuck in a chapter so close to finishing. I know this is completely normal when a big and exciting change is on the horizon, when something you’ve wanted for so long is so close you almost wish you could press “fast forward” on the time between where you are now and where you want to be. Thanks to the movie “Click” I know that’s a terrible idea but work with me here, ok? I’m antsy and currently in the “senioritis” portion of this chapter.

I came back to the blog to share this exciting and crazy time of moving to NYC and our new lives there. This amazing chapter that’s about to begin and weeks later, I’ve got nothing. A whole month went by without another thought hitting the page. I have been in such a creative rut lately and I think it comes down to really feeling stuck and reaching for whatever I can to feel content where I am at this very moment. Trying my hardest to “be present”, which, I tell you, is much easier said than done, despite all of those inspiring Pinterest quotes. My people here in town, that I will miss with every fiber of my being, are helping me to enjoy my last few months here, but it’s still not easy.

Thanks to the encouragement of those same sweet friends, I’m pushing through this creative rut I have found myself in and will keep writing, keep pushing through this mental block. I realized the other day that we’re actually starting the countdown and planning out our last few months as residents of North Carolina and being a bit more intentional of how we spend our time here, because there’s not much of it left to spare.

It’s exciting and scary. Some nights I wake up feeling so panicked, to be completely honest, at all of the unknown that comes with a huge change, no matter how much you’ve hoped and prayed for it. It’s been a roller coaster of emotions, you guys. But, you know, I think that’s how it’s supposed to feel when a lifelong dream is about to be realized. When you’re onto something so good you can feel it. I feel both unprepared and, at the same time, like I’ve been waiting for this new adventure for my entire life.