I was going to write a post that actually had a point this morning, I really was. I was sipping my coffee and still in the process of waking up when Adam walked into the living room, asked me to pick an outfit out for him and after I said “yes”, proceeded to begin singing the Gilligan’s Island theme song at the top of his lungs and all other plans went out the window.
Has he ever bursted into song? Sure. Has he ever bursted out in the Gilligan’s Island theme song? Actually, no. Has he ever begun loudly singing a theme song from any random television show from the 60′s? Never.
I made note that I had to discuss this on the blog today because it was random and awesome. It made me laugh on a Wednesday morning, before I had finished my cup of coffee, which is a feat in and of itself. Now it’s noted and saved for all eternity. Or as long as this blog exists.
I was feeling a bit off my game yesterday. This happens about once a month, it seems. Most days, I can handle social media and all of the noise. I am genuinely happy for other’s accomplishments, I am inspired by the images they share and feel generally positive about where I am in life. This has also become a lot easier since getting out of social media as my job. These days, I don’t have to be on it, so I can filter it better. Some days, I can’t handle it as well. Some days I fall into a web of feeling sorry for myself, comparing myself and feeling so far behind. Behind on what? I’m not sure. Just behind.
I’m getting it better at handling it, I believe. I’m learning to recognize when it’s starting, when the anxiety is beginning to creep back in and I try to fight it and choose a different feeling. I’ve heard it so many times, but it’s so much easier said than done that I often forget that I can CHOOSE joy.
I know some of us deal with anxiety and depression and the choice isn’t as attainable, but many of us can choose a different feeling. I’ll be honest, surrendering to those feelings is easy. Giving up is easy. Fighting against those thoughts is the hard part. It takes a lot of energy and the constant redirection of our thoughts. If we give up for a second, we can so quickly fall back into those feelings.
The truth is, our brain needs a workout just as much as our bodies do. I tried focusing on how I want to react instead and it really seemed to help. While I wasn’t able to fully recover my day, I certainly felt so much better than I usually do. I managed to find a balance somewhere in the middle of those feelings.
The beauty of those hard days, is that the days after are usually wonderful. Like today! I feel inspired again and ready to take on anything. The anxiety has eased up quite a bit and I am focused again. Also, the 8 1/2 hours of sleep certainly didn’t hurt.
Do you have days like this? How do you handle it?
Easter and Adam’s birthday occurred on the very same weekend this year and this called for celebration, like a quick trip to grab a half-dozen donuts before I put a lick of makeup on my face on Sunday morning. It called for lunch with my favorite guy at one of our favorite Mexican restaurants in Charlotte. It called for a visit to our favorite brewery and our favorite coffee shop which seems to be becoming a birthday tradition that we’re totally on board with. It called for a sweet Easter service the night before Easter Sunday. It called for many sweet moments with my favorite guy. I really do love him and am so thankful for him and the fact that he was born.
I am so incredibly thankful for all that Easter means, not just on a Sunday, but every single day. I am thankful for Jesus, thankful for grace and the fact that a perfect savior died for me. It’s too much to comprehend, really.
I hope your weekend was just as celebratory as ours. Perhaps for no other reason than the fact that it was the weekend. T-minus four days until the next one!
My dearest Adam,
I am so thankful you were born, on this day, 30 years ago. This year is going to be the most amazing yet, I just know it. You get better with age, my love. Never ever doubt that. Happy birthday to you, my very best friend.
I love you to the moon and back, with my whole heart.